Costs and burdens of CPE

As I get a grasp on one thing here in seminary life, another thing immediately pops up to give me stress.

I just recently started feeling more accustomed to class, more comfortable. And that really came with receiving some initial grades and feedback on some major papers and exams. It was a huge boon, not to my ego, but perhaps to my self confidence that yeah, this just might turn out ok. In fact, I was elated.

And not soon thereafter, just within a couple of days I am faced with having to determine where I will do CPE. This typically takes place the summer after the first year. So now is the time to figure it out.

I originally thought that you just did these programs. Sometimes you could be lucky in finding a stipend or such.

Today we had representatives from several local and nearby CPE programs on campus that we could meet with. In my first conversation it was made abundantly clear that stipends are only offered in exceptional circumstances and they always involve needing previous CPE experience and being a year long residence. Ok. Well, beyond that, CPE actually requires you to pay the institution you are doing your program at. On one level I understand it. And the cost isn't heinous ($600 or so), but is still prohibitive for a cash strapped seminary student.

So here is what has been running through my head all day: CPE is required by most dioceses (including mine), which means I have to take a course that is a full time job (Mon-Fri 8-5), you have to pay money to do it, and doing the course means you will not be able to have any sort of gainful employment during the summer (when the vast majority of these programs take place). So I can't make any extra money during the summer, I have to pay money to take this extra program, and did I mention that since I won't be enrolled in classes (I can't because of doing CPE) I'm not eligible for financial aid?

So where in the freaking hell am I supposed to come up with the money to live, pay for CPE, buy food and just generally exist?

Really? Who is the mental giant that came up with this program?

I swear, some of this stuff is just done to add extra burdens on students, as a test.

Not looking forward to this.