Messing up

By virtue of the electronic system put in place for assignments/readings etc to be assigned, I missed my very first writing assignment.

Now to be fair, the professor, whom I like quite a bit, was very gracious. Especially as I wasn't the only one to have done so.

Still, I was almost devastated. I missed turning in an assignment? In my second week of seminary? What the hell?

Again, the professor was gracious, told me to not even worry about it, she understood this system was new and could be confusing and we were all figuring it out.

But....

We had evening prayer right after class.

As the service went on my feelings of failure built. My stress magnified.

By the time the service was over it was all I could do to grab my bag and head back to my room.

I was almost shattered. In my second week of school I had already messed up. F*&ked up. Whatever.

I know the professor said/thought it wasn't such a big deal. But I had somehow missed everything, missed the assignment, messed up. Whatever.

I broke down once I got to my room. The stress of a new life, the work, messing up. It all came to bear.

I think I am ok now. I know I am better. Ok? We shall see.